Good Afternoon everyone! Madame Enzo here with a report on weight loss. That's right, everybody's god damn favorite topic. But this time I have some rather exciting news for all of you lazy couch potatoes who are too stubborn to actually get off the couch, get on a treadmill, and start walking. Dr. Sanford Siegal has invented the "Cookie Diet" in which you eat his chemically altered cookies and magically you lose weight. Nevermind the fact that that's about all you eat. If I only ate 5 packets of 100 calorie cookies a day-I'd lose weight too. But who wants to do that? What would I do without my eggs benedict, chocolate souflee, and daily spoonfuls of lard? These space cookies probably taste like cardboard. Pieces of shit. You eat this cookies think bad breath, irregular bowl movements, and getting tested.
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