Sweet dreams

Dear Geraldine,

My husband started snoring about two years into our marriage. I used to just nudge him to get him to stop, but as time went by, his snoring got louder and louder. Eventually I had to start sleeping on the couch. It's gotten so loud that I'm worried something might be wrong. What do you think we should do?

Sleepless,

Barb

Dear Barb,

So loud you had to switch rooms? My guess is your husband has sleep apnea. Sleep apnea affects over 18 million people in America alone. It occurs when the passages in the throat fail to stay open while you're sleeping. It causes shortness of breath and can make you choke. Most people who suffer from it wake up groggy and don't really get the rest they need from sleeping. Therefore, I suggest you do nothing about it. Your husband will probably be so drained that he'll fall asleep behind the wheel of a car, crash, and solve the snoring problem for you. Then not only are you off the couch, but your get your double bed completely to yourself! Plus people make the best food for you when you lose a spouse.

Hungry,

Geraldine Hairpiece